Salim M. Ghadban
University of Copenhagen
Faculty of Humanities
Department of English
BA- Project 2015
Translating and Retranslating
“Det Lykkelige Arabien”
Into English
-A contrastive Analysis-
Supervised by: Kristian Tangsgaard Hvelplund
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Table of contents
1. Introduction 3
1-1 Introduction to the book "Det Lykkelige Arabien" 3
2. Theory 4
2.1 The macro strategies 5
2.2 Normes 6
2.3 The micro strategies 6
3. The audience 7
4. The languaculture of the source text 8
5. Analysis of the McFarlanes’ target text 10
6. Ghadban’s translation 11
7. Analysis of micro strategies 14
8. Analysis of Ghadban’s target text 17
9. Conclusion 18
10. Sammendrag: 18 8
11. References 20 0
12. Pensum 21
Appendix 1: The List of the contrastive micro strategies in the two TTs. 21 2
Appendix 2: The micro strategies in Ghadban’s translation. 25 5
Appendix 3: The micro strategies in the McFarlanes’ translation 29
Appendix 4: Thorkild Hansen- Det Lykkelige Arabien- from cap. 6 33
Appendix 5: Arabia Felix, from cap. 6- translated by James and Kathleen McFarlane 36
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1.Introduction
This paper is about translation of the Danish book “Det lykkelige Arabien”, into English by James McFarlane and Kathleen McFarlane in 1964, and the strategies used in this process. Translation can be literal or free. Literal translation is necessary for reporting technical or legal procedures as free translation may lead to misunderstanding. On the other hand, free translation, which gives sense to sense meaning, frees the translators from the constraints in the source text.
The aim of the project is to translate a part of a Danish book entitled “Det lykkelige Arabien” authored by Thorkild Hansen. The purpose is to compare those two translation styles.
“Det lykkelige Arabien” is a novel about a journey to Arabian Peninsula in the period of 1761-67. The journey involved five scholars and their servants. They left Denmark in 1761. In their way to the Arab peninsula, they visited several countries: France, Turkey and Egypt, to name a few. In the Arab peninsula, they visited several cities and most of the major cities in Yemen. In this project, one focuses on the Yemen section of their book.
There is only one English translation of “Det Lykkelige Arabien” which is made by “James and Kathleen McFarlane”. Their translation is biased toward the literal translation style for the reasons stated in my discussion. This project will examine and compare the original translation with a new translation carried out by this project’s author. The examination will compare and discuss the translations with respect to styles, translation choices and micro strategies.
1.1 Introduction to the original book “Det Lykkelige Arabien”
This is a novel that is based on a real story, and on the diaries of the participants in the Danish expedition to Arabia. So it is both narrative and documentary, and the line between both is blurred. Five Danish scholars were sent to discover Arabia in 1761. Among them was Carsten Niebuhr, the only man who survived and returned alive to Denmark. The expedition visited many countries: Turkey, Egypt, Yemen, India, Persia, etc. According to the author of the book, Thorkild Hansen, the whole of Europe paid attention to this expedition at that time. With my translation, I do not have any intention to show that the McFarlanes’ translation is bad.
The section that I have translated focuses on Carsten Niebuhr’s role as a translator. He had an excellent character, and sought for knowledge. After his books about the journey had been translated from German into Danish, he became famous in Denmark. By retranslating a part of the source text (ST), the aim is to demonstrate that different target texts from the same source
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text can use different translation strategies and maintain the same whole meaning of the text. This paper sheds light on “Det Lykkelige Arabien”, discusses its original translation, gives an alternative translation, and shows differences and similarities between both of them.
2. Theory
The task of the translator is to convey the message in the Source Text (ST) to the Target Text (TT), taking into consideration the form of the ST. “Det lykkelige Arabien” is written and translated half a century ago. Since then, the system of value of translation has significantly shifted, giving the highest priority to the context as highlighted by Ana Rojo below:
...the notion of context can at last get rid of its burden as a secondary concept to become the prime factor in the translation process.1
Considering the highest priority for the context made the translation process more complex. To practice it properly, the translator has to be sufficiently good at both languages from the beginning. Otherwise, he will face a lot of difficulties. One of the difficulties, for example, could lie in the dynamic of the semantic field as highlighted by Mona Baker as below:
One important thing to bear in mind when dealing with semantic fields is that they are not fixed. Semantic fields are always changing, with new words and expressions being introduced into the language and others being dropped as they become less relevant to the needs of a linguistic community.2
Semantic fields include several levels such as word and collocations level. On the word level, for instance, some words have the same form in the target language (TL) but not the same meaning. These are called “false friends”. For instance, “appeal” in Danish has an equivalent in form in English, but the meaning is different. Polysemy (when words have many meanings) is another problem. Some words are super ordinates in categories. Others are hyponyms. A word can for instance be under category in one language but super category in the target language. The most important among them at the world level is the non-equivalence as referred to by Bassnett in Munday Jeremy (2001) as below:
Translation involves far more than replacement of lexical and grammatical items between languages… Once the translator moves away from close linguistic equivalence, the problem of determining the exact nature of the level of equivalence aimed for begin to emerge. (Bassnett 1980/91. 25)3
1 Rojo Ana, p. 7, ls. 34-36.
2 Baker, Mona (1992), P.20, ls. 21-25
3 Munday Jeremy (2001), p. 49, ls. 31-35.
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Common problems of non-equivalence are listed below:
Culture-specific concepts
The source language concept is not lexicalized in the target language
The source language word is semantically complex
The source and target languages make different distinctions in meaning
The target language lacks a super ordinate
The target language lacks a specific term (hyponym)
Differences in physical or interpersonal perspective
Differences in expressive meaning
Differences in form
Differences in frequency and purpose of using specific forms
The use of loan words in the source text4
On the collocations level, for instance, the meaning of a word often depends on its association with other words. “Collocations are fairly flexible patterns of language which allow several variations in form.” But some collocations are almost constant or hard to change. They are called “idioms”. An idiom can have an equivalent in the target language, but many idioms may not have any equivalent because they are culture-specific.
On other levels, many problems may arise from the cultural differences like the notion of value, the cultural value, gender, history of words, and metaphors.
There are many strategies that may help the translator during the translation process. One of the strategies is that translators may do some research of different kinds to overcome the obstacles that they may face during the translation. Translators are also encouraged to follow a certain translation strategy. Scholars have divided the strategies of translation into macro and micro strategies.
2.1 The macro strategies:
Translators definitely use macro and micro strategies. Macro strategies are the first principal strategies that a translator should think about. The translator must study the source text first before deciding which macro strategy s/he should choose. Macro strategy can be overt or covert translation; it can be direct (literal) or oblique translation, semantic or communicative translation, and it can adopt a norm of acceptability or a norm of adequacy. Direct translation is more common than the oblique translation. The last is usually used when there are some obstacles that prevent using the first.
Semantic translation renders the same exact meaning of the source text, while communicative translation tries to produce an effect on the reader similar to the effect on the original reader. In adequate translation, the translator tries to subject himself to the norms of the
4 Baker, Mona,(1992), p. 21, ls. 5, 8, 24. P.22, ls. 1, 20, 33. P.23, ls. 5, 18, 27. P. 24 l. 15. P. 25, ls. 3, 13.
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source text and its culture, while in an acceptable translation he subjects himself to the norms of the target text and its culture.
Macro strategy can also be source-text oriented or target-text oriented. According to the “Norms”, shown in Figure 7.1, I and the McFarlanes have used the same macro strategy; the TT oriented one which will definitely result in producing an acceptable translation, as highlighted in Figure 7.1.
2.2 Norms:
Norms are “options that translators in a given socio-historical context select on a regular basis”; Baker (1997a: 164), they appear to exert pressure and to perform some kind of prescriptive function.5
Figure 7.16 shows the translation initial norms and its sub-classifications.
Norms are set by translators through long periods of experience.
2.3 The micro strategies: Micro strategies deal with specific problems in the text encountered by the translator in connection with transfer of words, sentences, phrases, idioms etc. According to Jeremy in Introducing Translation Studies, micro strategies can be direct transfer, direct
5 Munday Jeremy, (2001), p.113, ls.27-29.
6 Munday Jeremy (2001) p.114.
Initial norms
Subjection to source norms
Subjection to target culture norms
Acceptable translation
norms
Adequate translation
norms
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translation, oblique translation and explicitation, to name a few. Direct translation is the more usual way unless there is a good reason to avoid it.
Definition of the micro strategies, as they will be used in the analysis:
Direct transfer: It is transferring the word or expression as it is to the other language in the TT, because there may be some reasons that prevent its translation.
Direct translation: One translates word for word.
Oblique translation: It is translating the sense of an expression regardless of the exact words’ meanings.
Explicitation: Sometimes the translator is obliged to give a footnote or an explicitation between brackets to give a good explanation of the defined situation, or to explain something more about a word or an expression.
Paraphrase: Languages are different in structure. Therefore one uses paraphrase to express the intended meaning of the author.
Condensation: It is used when information is more important than the style.
Adaptation: It helps to keep a good style in the TT and recreates the same effect of the source text.
Addition: One adds one or more words to overcome the language differences.
Substitution: When an expression cannot be translated for some reasons, one substitutes it with an equivalent one with a slightly different meaning, because the exact meaning cannot be found.
Deletion: One deletes a word or expression, when it cannot be translated and at the same time does not bear any importance for the meaning.
Permutation: The translator finds himself obliged to place the translated item in a different place.
3. The audience
This section defines the source text audience, the McFarlanes’ translation audience, and my translation’s audience. McFarlanes’ audience is the English speaking readers of the book “Arabia Felix”, the publishers, and the critics. I have a broader approach. My audience are the scholars, and people who are interested in expeditions to Arabia, in knowledge, in colonialism and in the Arabic world and its culture. The audience of the source text is limited to people who speak Danish and are interested in books, especially those interested in expeditions.
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4. The languaculture of the source text
As it was previously discussed, translation is a difficult task that requires deep understanding of two different cultures. This necessitates that the translator should be an avid reader and has many talents. For example, one must possess excellent knowledge not only of the languages of the source- and target-texts, but also of their cultures. One must also be a good at conveying the knowledge and coordinating two cultures. Therefore, when translating a text from one language into another, one should consider the languaculture, which is a concept introduced by Michael Ager to highlight that using a language involves all manners and background knowledge and local information in addition to grammar and vocabulary7 of the source and the target cultures, not the language isolated from its culture.
… the “real world” is to a large extent unconsciously built up on the language habits of the group. No more languages are ever sufficiently similar to be considered as representing the same social reality.8
Languaculture is relevant to translation. Many words could be difficult or even impossible to translate because of their cultural reference. As the source text is about Arabic culture, and visiting an Arabic country, I took that into consideration in my TT:
-“Mokka” ST P. 284, 16:
It is a village name in Yemen. Not all village names can be written in the same way in both languages. In English it is “Mocha.” Names, in general, can be written differently in the different languages. Therefore translators should be careful and pay attention to the differences.
- “Fakih Ahmad” ST, P.281, 30:
“Fakih” is an Arabic word for a religious scholar. Hansen transferred it into English. The same did Ghadban.
- “for at blive kvit!” ST, P. 282, 20:
In formal English one does not use an exclamation mark. Therefore one should take care of it and not transfer it to the TT.
-“hurra-raab” ST, P. 284, 7
7 Ager, Michael: Culture: Can you take it anywhere?
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In Arabic culture one does not find this word, because it could be anything that bears greeting, like: Yehia Al Imam.
-“Det rأ¸de Hav” ST, P. 284, 12:
In Carsten Niebuhr’s time, it was called “The Arabian Gulf”. But there is no explicitation for that made by Hansen.
- “komassi” ST, P. 284, 31: It is Yemen coin of that era, and literally means “pentagon”. After deep investigation, one found an example of a pentagon-shaped coin. One translator may choose to translate it as a pentagon shaped coin. But as it is not useful to translate it into “pentagon” one chooses to transfer it as it is into English, but “Comassi” instead of “komassi” as English used to use “C” where Danish used to use “K”. Here, an explicitaion of “komassi” is needed ‘’. However, as per my Arabic background, this word is pronounced in Arabic as “Khomassi.”
- “spiecedaler” ST,P. 284, 31:
It is a Danish word and a coin.
- “vilde” ST, P. 285, 1:
It is an old version of the Danish word “ville” or “would” in English.
- “astrolabium” ST, P. 285, 8:
It is an Arabic word transferred in old days into Latin by adding “ium” to its end. It is again transferred into Danish and into English.
- “Kairo” ST, P. 285, 32:
Again, English here uses C in nouns where Danish uses K.
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5. Analysis of the McFarlanes’ target text
After critically reading McFarlances’ target text, I found that there are no major additions or omissions within the TT. There is no tendency towards explicitation, or footnotes, but only one explicitation between brackets. The word order and cohesion shifts seem to be target language oriented, especially regarding inversion. The source text is in Danish, which makes it easy to be assimilated into the target Language (English), because of the closeness of both cultures, and the languages are of the same family inside the Indo-European group of languages. It is possible, although the choice is not obvious, that the translators choose here a covert translation (target text oriented approach). Some words are deleted in different situations, others were changed to better adapt the situation. Although there are many exceptions, but the translators’ approach is inclined to be a word-to-word translation and adhering closely to the target language. Some translators would reject this translation strategy, as it would be unable to convey the same meaning as the source text.
Certain cultural lexical items in the ST are retained in the TT, so that the latter has the same style as the former. Some items have been italicized to emphasize their foreignness (example: komassi and speciedaler). Ghadban does the same but adds an explicitation for each of these words.
The McFarlanes have only one explicitation in their part of the TT. In my point of view, which could differ from some scholars’, the McFarlanes should have added more explicitation, given a documentary and informative text type.
The TT of an informative text should transmit the full referential or conceptual content of the ST. The translation should be in “plain prose”, with the use of explicitation as necessary and without redundancy.
Some Danish words were kept unchanged like “spiecedaler” and “Dukater” etc. It is, however, worth mentioning that the exact identity of the source text almost impossible to be replicated in the target text. Nothing refers to any serious problem in the translation, though the translators do not translate some words in a formal way. Some examples are given below:’
Source text
Target text
Formal language
Ifأ¸rt p. 281 l. 18
dressed p.286 l.33
arrayed in
Anbragt p.283 l. 9
situated p.288 l.25
Placed
Fأ¸rst og fremmest p. 284 l.22
first and foremost p.290 l.5
Primarily
Straks p.285 l.4
immediately p.290 l.25
Instantly
Handel p. 285 l. 12
trade p.290 l.32
Commerce
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The translators use a variant of micro strategies as it is expected, because the text subject to translation is long enough. They use direct translation, deletion, paraphrase,, substitution, addition, oblique translation, adaption, and once they split a paragraph into two (2nd paragraph), some other times they split some long sentences.
For further details on the micro strategies in the McFarlanes’ TT look at Appendix 3.
6. Ghadban’s translation
Salim M. Ghadban’s translation of “Det Lykkelige Arabien“ 2 4th edition 1980. Cap. 6 Part 5. P.281- 285
Before reaching the imam’s city, they were sick and tired and some of them have already passed away. Since they were in Egypt, Niebuhr, Kramer, and Baurenfeind, the only survivals so far, did not change their clothes. The clothes are now so ragged and dirty, depicting starving robbers on their faces. They concluded that they cannot ride into the Imam’s city in such rags. They decide to enter a close café cottage in order to better shape themselves.
Luckily, they have some Turkish dresses, which they have got in Constantinople. They are not in particular suitable to these localities, but they are clean and tidy. After they wash and clip their beards, they take the new clothes on, and continue refreshed down along the mountain road.
Close to the Imam’s city, a noble Arab passes, riding on a horse. Reaching them, he halts over and presents himself as the Fakih Ahmad’s scrivener. He tells them that they have already been waiting for them for a long time. After a rumour about their arrival has spread in the city sometime ago, the Imam ordered him to ride to them. The purpose of the ride was to meet them and convey a welcoming message and guide them to a comfortable country house placed for them by the Imam.
Finally, reaching a comfortable place, Niebuhr and his companions spend the night in good beds for the first time in a long period. Next day, while having morning coffee, the Imam’s gifts arrive as a welcome. It is a whole procession, having five living sheep, three camels loaded with firewood for the kitchen, a number of candles, sacks with rice, and all kinds of fruits and vegetables. The procession reaches with an apology that states that the imam is very busy and can only receive them two days later.
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Niebuhr complains in his diary about the postponement. He is worry about the English ships. He also believes it is impolite to go in the streets in Sana'a9, before the Imam has received them, the postponement means that they have to spend two days without work in their country house. However this gives them a chance for recovery and getting better.
While waiting for the Imam, Berggren’s arrival from Damar raises their morale. The strong Swede seems bleary-eyed. He admits that this trip was harder than the war in Prussia, but there was not another exit for him than to continue towards Sana’a. At the time people would see him; they simply refuse to let him a house. They were afraid that he would maybe die among them. Moreover, in one place, people gave him a donkey to ride and continue his way just to get rid of him.
The participants in the expedition are all collected in the country house arranged by the Imam, with the exception of the two who will never make it to Sana’a. Niebuhr wanders about in the noble neighbourhood, eats grapes, and releases himself from the sadly thoughts about the past, and the concerns of the future, saying “For a long time we had not have such a comfortable house. The house contains sheer beautiful rooms, and is surrounded by a garden with all kinds of fruit trees, which are apparently growing wildly. It was a garden with an Arabic style, with a water spring and basins, and where one searches for shadowing, rather than wandering.”
On the 19th of July, early morning, Fakih Ahmad’s scrivener arrives, and leads them to the palace where big arrangements have been made for them. The sunny yard is congested with horses, servants, and officials. When the chef of the Imam’s stable arrives, he opens a passage for them with a big stick in his hand. Participants of the expedition finally succeed in reaching the entrance. It is Carsten Niebuhr who is the only one that can speak Arabic, and who leads the expedition. Here, the description of the meeting between the expedition participants and his Excellency the Imam of Arabia Felix is told by Carsten Niebuhr’s son himself as follows:
“The meeting of the audience was held in a big rectangular hall under a vault. In the middle, there was a fountain, whose water reached 14 feet into the air. Behind the basin there was a dais, and further back another dais where the Imam’s throne was placed. The whole ground around the basin as well as the daises were covered with Persian carpets. The throne itself was made of only a square dais covered with silk fabric, and over it three bolsters were placed, one at the back, and one on each side of the Imam, and all were upholstered with very valuable fabrics. The Imam himself sat on the throne between the bolsters, in a way called in Arabic as Korfusa’a, (an eastern style of sitting). He is covered with a light green blouse with long wide sleeves. On both sides of the chest, he had a big golden bow fastened to his royal clothes. His sons stood on his right side, his brothers stood on his left. His minister of state stood in front of him on the dais, and one step forward down, the participants in the Danish expedition now stood. Along the walls, and completely right up to the door, the noble Arabs stood in two long rows.
9 This is as it is pronounced in Arabic. It is written in English as Sana.
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Then we were led to the Imam in order to kiss his right hand from both sides, and his dress over his knee. The first, and the last, are rather normal when one stands in front of an Arabic prince. On the other hand, it is an extraordinary big honour, when they stretch out their hand to a foreigner, and let him kiss the palm of the hand. Deep silence reigned in the whole hall. But at the same moment one of us touched the Imam’s hand, a herald shouted some words, which could mean something like “Allah, preserve the Imam.” Attendance is thought to shout repeatedly the words as loudly as possible. I was the first to present myself to the Imam. I thought of reciting my complements in as good Arabic as I can. As I touched the Imam’s hand, they began to shout. This made me a little frightened as I have not seen such a thing in any other place in Arabia. I rapidly comprehended the situation. I discovered that this ceremony is going on in the same way when we at home greet a man by shouting “hurrah.”
It is difficult for Carsten Niebuhr to understand the dialect of Sana’a. The next conversation with the Imam, he arranged an interpreter. He rather prefers not to go into the details regarding the motives of their journey. He therefore claims that they are Danish, and they have travelled over The Red Sea (named during this era as Arabian Gulf) because it is the shortest way to the Danish colony “Trankebar.”
Under this part of the journey, they would visit the Imam’s wide land, which is famous for its richness and splendours. Niebuhr does not mention that their pleasure has cost them the lives of two companions; their stay in Mocha has cost them 50 Venetian ducats; and the inhabitants in Jerim and Damar have received them by throwing stones. He says that he cannot detain a eulogy of the security, with which they could wander on the Imam’s roads, as well as that hospitality, with which they were everywhere received. So he gives a sign to the others and shows their collection of strange things, primarily the magnifying glass, and the telescope. They rehearse their circus performance. Niebuhr also shows their barometer and compasses, some of Baurenfeind’s drawings, some copperplates, maps, and a map over sea. At the end, he hands out gifts to the Imam and Fakih Ahmad consisting of watches, and different physical instruments left by Forskأ¥l. Everything is received graciously.
When they return to the house and the garden with the water springs, each of the participants receives a purse, which contains 99 comassi (a Yemen coin which has 5 edges.) or three speciedaler in change. The cashier is a little puzzled by the strange gift: “It was strange that the Imam sent us money only in change, but because somebody in the market has to buy everything in cash so that it could be a good gesture from the Arabs’ side. The meaning is that we spare ourselves troubles of changing money.”
After the Danish expedition meeting with the Imam, the participants were free to wander in the capital. Niebuhr, instantly, starts working on a city map. Now, in his work, he is strongly annoyed by crowds of curious people. He cannot continue his work in taking the angle measurements with his aster lab and his compass. To proceed further, he should follow the technique that he has used in Egypt: going in the streets from one end to the other, pretending as nothing has happened.
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Using the drawn city map, he tries to form a general overview of the commerce of the city, a work that he used to carry out together with Forskأ¥l. He seeks out the comprehensive quarters of the market and describes the separate alleys where people trade with firewood, charcoal, iron, grapes, corn, butter, salt, and bread. Almost always, only women sell bread in Arabia.
Moreover, it is a particular market where old clothes changes for the new. There are stalls with Turkish, Indian, and Persian goods. There are herbs and medicine, dried and fresh fruits, as pear, and apricot, peach, and fig. There are streets for handicraft with blacksmiths, shoemakers, saddlers, tailors, hatters, stonemasons, goldsmiths, bookbinders and scriveners. In most places, fresh vegetables are abundant. Of grapes only, one can count up to 20 different kinds.
The capital of Arabia Felix surpasses all expectations. Sana’a is really a paradise on earth. Definitely, after the Danish expedition was very kindly received by all the public officers, nobody in the streets asks them for money. Now, they are reassured that nobody would throw stones against their windows any more. They currently live in a country house, where they have never lived in such a comfort through their journey. Imam sends them an invitation to stay as his guests for one more year in the city, Sana’a, the main destination of their journey. They happily accept the invitation and thank the Imam for the magnanimous invitation.
7. Analysis of micro strategies
This analysis below discusses my own translation of five pages of the book “Det Lykkelige Arabien” into English. It comments on my translation and the McFarlanes’ translation, and compares them in order to identify the main differences.
7.1 A Contrastive analysis: The micro strategies in the TTs.
The quantitative overview below is based on the list of the contrastive micro strategies present in appendices 2 and 3. The micro strategy McFarlanes’ translation Ghadban’s translation Adaptation - 2 Addition 8 2 Deletion 8 5 Direct translation 2 - Explicitaion 2 4
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Oblique translation 1 - Paraphrase 3 15 Substitution 8 - Parting paragraphs - 3 Parting sentences. 5 11
Table 1: shows the number of micro strategies considered by the translators.
Table1 shows that the McFarlanes have more direct translation while Ghadban has more adaptation, explicitation, much more paraphrases, more split paragraphs and much more split sentences. I used the last two micro strategies to make the text much easier to understand. (I refer to the definitions of micro strategies on p.6). This can be evidence that The McFarlanes use word-to-word translation, while Ghadban uses the sense-to-sense one. The distinction between word-for-word and sense- for sense- translation is not a new issue. Many scholars rejected word-for-word translation.
Jerome rejected the (word-for-word) approach because, by following so closely the form of the ST, it produced an absurd translation, cloaking the sense of the original. The sense-for-sense approach, on the other hand, allowed the sense or content of the ST to be translated.10,11
Here, I will give two analysed examples. The changed words are highlighted with bold letters.
Ex.1 : Paraphrase, addition, and direct translation
The source text
Ghadban’s translation
McFarlanes’ translation
Niebuhr, Kramer og Baurenfeind er stadig ifأ¸rt arbejdstأ¸j der har hأ¦ngt pأ¥ dem lige siden أ†gypten og som efterhaanden er blevet saa laset og snavset, at de med deres sygdomshأ¦rgede ansigter
Before reaching the Imam’s city, they were sick and tired and some of them have already passed away. Since they were in Egypt, Niebuhr, Kramer, and Baurenfeind, the only survivals so far, did not
Niebuhr, Kramer and Baurenfeind were still dressed in their Arab robes,which they had worn ever since Egypt and which had gradually become so tattered and dirty that, with faces
10 Jeremy Munday, p.31, 23-26.
11 St. Jerome is a translator who lived in the fourth century and became famous after he compared the Hebrew Bible with the Greek translation.
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nأ¦rmest ligner en bande forsultne rأ¸vere. (p.281, 18-21)
change their clothes. The clothes are now so ragged and dirty, depicting starving robbers on their faces. (P.11, 9-12)
drawn and ravaged by sickness, they looked more like a band of famished robbers than anything else. (P. 286, 33-37)
I use paraphrases, and addition, to make the expression easy to understand but the McFarlanes used direct translation. In this sentence, lige does not have its precise equivalent in English. Therefore, I doubt that they gave the right meaning for the expression.
The McFarlanes use addition (drawn), a description after the noun. At the end of the sentence, they use addition again (more) and (than anything else), although it is not necessary.
Ex.2 Direct translation, deletion, substitution, and splitting a long sentence.
The source text
Ghadban’s translation
McFarlanes’ translation
Den nat sover den danske ekspedition for fأ¸rste gang I lange tider I rigtige senge, og da de sidder med morgenkaffen den fأ¸lgende dag ankommer Imamens velkomstgaver. (p. 282, 1-3)
Finally, reaching a comfortable place, Niebuhr and his companions spend that night in good beds for the first time in a long period. Next day, while having morning coffee, the Imam’s gifts arrive as a welcome.( P.11, 25-27)
That night the expedition slept for the first time for many a long day in proper beds; and as they sat drinking their morning coffee the following day, the Imam’s gifts of welcome arrived. (p. 287, 15-18)
I deleted danske, the McFarlanes also deleted it in their translation. I think that they don’t find the word important, as the readers already know that the expedition is Danish. I deleted the long sentence to simplify the paragraph.
After many attempts to search for any literary reviews about the TT Arabia Felix, one could hardly find anything. This calls in a question about the success of Arabia Felix in the English-speaking world. Otherwise, one finds so many reviews on “Det Lykkelige Arabien “in Denmark. After the publishing of the source text in Denmark, it did not take the McFarlanes so many years before they translated it into English. Why? Is the “Det Lykkelige Arabien” so important? What role were they trying to play? About the real motives, one does not have much information.
From the practical side, one supposes that the McFarlanes had worked closely together to translate the ST, which gave them a better chance to reach a better translation result than Ghadban’s. This may explain why the Mcfarlanes’ TT does not have many errors. But I would like to know the reactions of the audience (readers, critics, publishers, etc.) to the TT which is in this
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case a whole book while Ghadban’s TT is of five pages. One other difference between the two TTs is their goals. Mcfarlanes’ goal is to entertain the readers of books while Ghadban’s goal is to apply it in this paper for the scholars to read. One wonders who commissioned the translation of “Det Lykkelige Arabien” and why the McFarlanes did the translation; and if the same ST has been translated into English under a different title.
8. Analysis of Ghadban’s target text
Communicative macro strategy tries to produce on its readers the same effect that was produced on the readers of the source text. I claim that I adopt this strategy in my translation. I also adopt an acceptable translation as I subject myself to the norms of the target text and its culture.
The TT is written in present tense as in the source text (Det Lykkelige Arabien). I use dynamic equivalence.
Dynamic equivalence is based on what Nida calls “the principle of equivalent effect”, where the relationship between recipient and message should be substantially the same as that which existed between the original recipient and the message. (Nida 1964: 159)12
I claim that I use a covert translation macro strategy. This means that one focuses on the target text effect, (target text oriented approach), using the norm of acceptability by subjecting myself to the norms of the English language and English culture. I transfer foreign elements into the target language culture, (footnotes are provided), rendering loyalty to the target language norms. In general, I try to write a translation in a communicative way, subjecting myself to the norms of the target text and its culture, and taking into consideration the characteristics of the English language in order to be idiomatic. I try to recreate the spirit of the ST and not imitate it, understanding that a TT can never reach the heights of an ST. The aim is to provide the reader with a TT that is internally coherent and yet concisely convey the message of the ST, taking into consideration that the source text is telling a story about a journey to Arabia about 250 years ago. Explicitation is used regularly. Direct transfer and literal translation are employed when necessary to give the intended meaning. Old words from the eighteenth century are considered to give the target text the spirit of the past. Examples include: scrivener, (GT, P.11, 19) and dais (GT, P. 12, 27 & 33). Sentence structure is, sometimes, altered to enhance the readability and fluency. The target text adheres to the norms of its cultural system, without making use of major additions or deletions. Instead, paraphrases and splitting the very long sentences to improve the comprehension are frequently used.
12 Munday Jeremy (2001), p.42,. 1-4.
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9. Conclusion
This project is a comparison of two translations of “Det lykkelige Arabien” into English. Translation is an intricate task. Translators can use a macro strategy and several micro strategies. Translators should decide which macro strategy they will use before starting translation. During translating process, they can choose among the different micro strategies that suit the particular situation.
Translators can sometimes agree or disagree on the use of different strategies. The use of macro and micro strategies depends on many elements; one of these is the source text. Here, the McFarlanes and I choose the same macro strategy. Translation is a rich concept. A text can be translated in so many ways. Translators should be aware of non-equivalence which is a main problem in translation.
Both target texts are target language oriented. Therefore, the target texts are simple to the English speaking readers to understand. My translation is not an imitation of the McFarlanes’ TT although the McFarlanes are adept in English and are native English speakers. So they have so much authority, and they have a very good translation. One can hardly fault them but producing a better translation can be possible. The main difference between the two translations is that The McFarlanes’ translation is inclined to be a word-for-word translation, while mine is inclined to be sense-to-sense. So, although there is some resemblance between the two TTs, but they are far away from being coincident. One takes into consideration that we have different sets of readers.
I believe this project adds a new translation experience, shedding the light on some translation problems and the mechanisms or strategies to decipher them.
10. Sammendrag:
Indledningen til opgaven begynder med et par linjer om oversأ¦ttelse og dens strategier. Derefter blev min egen plan introduceret, hvor hovedvأ¦rket var en kildetekst fra “Det Lykkelige Arabien.” Bogen var oversat fra dansk til engelsk i 1964 af McFarlanes. Efter indledningen om bogen er der blevet prأ¦senteret en oversأ¦ttelse af fem selvvalgte sidder fra bogen.
I teoriparagraffen er der et diagram for at bevise strategierne som er benyttet af oversأ¦tterne af de to mأ¥letekster. Endvidere fأ¸lger der en notering om hver enkel mikrostrategi som er anvendt i begge oversأ¦ttelsesprocesser samt en definition til hver mikrostrategi. Der er blevet givet en ide om publikum, og en om “languaculture” i kildeteksten. McFarlaners’ mأ¥ltekst, er blevet analyseret og deres strategier er blevet diskuteret. Konklusionen er at McFarlaners’ oversأ¦ttelse lأ¦ner sig mere til ord-for-ord oversأ¦ttelse, blandt andet har de benyttet sig af mange uformelle ord. Derefter, prأ¦senterede jeg min mأ¥ltekst som bestأ¥r af tre sider (P. 10-14).
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Der er inkluderet en diskussion om mikrostrategierne og en kontrastiveanalyse af de to mأ¥ltekster er blevet prأ¦senteret. Efterfأ¸lgende, prأ¦senteres et skema der belyser forskelligheden i talerne af mikrostrategierne brugt af begge parter. Det viste sig, at dette skema er vigtigt, fordi det giver evidens pأ¥, at McFarlane أ¦gteparrets’ oversأ¦ttelse lأ¦ner sig til ord-for-ord oversأ¦ttelse, mens min oversأ¦ttelse lأ¦ner sig mest til frit oversأ¦ttelse, hvilket er ogsأ¥ blevet diskuteret. En analyse af min oversatte tekst og de valgte strategier er blevet vist, samt min egn oversأ¦ttelse, hvor de gamle historiske ord i kildeteksen fra 1700 taller er taget i betragtning
Hoved konklusionen er ret afklaret, at McFarlane أ¦gteparrets’ oversأ¦ttelse igen lأ¦ner sig til ord-for-ord oversأ¦ttelse, mens min oversأ¦ttelse lأ¦ner sig mere til frit form oversأ¦ttelse.
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11. References
Ager Michael (2006): Culture : Can you take it anywhere?
In International Journal of Qualitative Methods, no. 5. 20, 2 ns.
Andersen Frits 2002, article ”Felix Arabia,” Vinduet tidsskrift
Baker, Mona(1992): In other Words
Hansen Thorkild (1964): Det Lykkelige Arabien, Gyldendal
Lauridsen, Gerner (1989): Om oversأ¦ttelse af prأ¦positionen ”i” fra dansk til
engelsk:
en oversأ¦ttelseskritisk analyse
McFarlane, James and Kathleen: Arabia Felix, the Danish Expedition of 1761- 1767, Harper & Row, Publishers, New York and Evanston.
Munday Jeremy, (2001), Introducing TRANSLATION STUDIES, THEORIES AND APPLICATIONS, published by Routled
Rojo, Ana, Iraid Ibarretxe- Antunano (Eds), (2009):
Cognitive Linguistics and translation
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Appendix 1: The List of the contrastive micro strategies in the two TTs.
… at de med deres… ST, p. 281,20: Ghadban uses paraphrase, while the McFarlanes use direct translation.
… og da de sidder… ST P. 282,2: Ghadban parts the long sentence, while McFarlanes use semicolon.
… ankkommer Imamens velkomstgaver. ST,P. 282, 3: Ghadban uses adaptation. The McFarlanes use direct translation.
, der er fem ST, P. 282, 3-4: Ghadban parts the long sentence, the McFarlanes uses deletion and colon.
; han er travlt… ST, P. 282, 7: Ghadban uses addition but parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes use addition and deletion.
Humأ¸ret stiger… ST, P. 282, 13: Ghadban uses paraphrase. The McFarlanes use addition.
… min sandten… ST, P. 282, 14: Ghadban uses deletion. The McFarlanes use paraphrase.
, han indrأ¸mmer… ST, P. 282, 15: Ghadban parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes do the same.
; ved synet af hans tilstand… ST, P. 282, 17: Ghadban uses paraphrase and parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes use substitution and part the sentence.
… mellem hأ¦nderne paa dem, et sted… ST, P. 282, 19: Ghadban uses paraphrase and parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes use deletion and part the sentence.
Note: At the end of the above sentence there is an exclamation mark in the source text but not in either of the TTs. The reason is that the exclamation mark is not used in formal English.
… ikke spadseregange…” ST, P. 282, 28: Ghadban uses paraphrase as the MacFarlanes do.
, og fأ¸rst… ST, P. 282, 33: Ghadban parts the long sentence, while the McFarlanes use paraphrase.
, pأ¥ hans hأ¸jre side stod hans sأ¸nner… ST, P. 283, 18: Ghadban changes the structure of the sentence. The McFarlanes use direct translation.
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; derimod… ST, P. 283, 26: Ghadban uses paraphrase, and parts the long sentence, while the McFarlanes but use direct translation.
“Allah…ST, P. 283, 30: Ghadban uses explicitaion (footenote); McFarlanes do not.
Jeg fattede mig dog hurtigt igen,… ST, P. 284,3: Ghadban uses paraphrase, the McFarlanes too use paraphrase.
Note: the word “Hurra-rأ¥be”, p. 284, 7 has no equivalent one, neither in Arabic nor in English. That is why it is considered not correct to write it in Danish. I suppose that Niebuhr could not find out what the Arabs were saying. The McFarlanes has used a paraphrase instead of it.
… den dialect, der tales I Sana,… ST, P. 284, 8-9: Ghadban uses paraphrase, while the McFarlanes use direct translation.
… og maa under den efterfأ¸lgende samtale… ST, P. 284, 9: Ghadban uses deletion, the MacFarlanes also use deletion.
Da han helst ikke vil gaa… ST, P. 284, 10: Ghadban uses adaptation, the McFarlanes use paraphrase.
Undervejs hertil… ST. P. 284, 13: Ghadban uses paraphrase and parts the paragraph. The McFarlanes use paraphrase.
, berأ¸mt for… ST, P. 284, 14: Ghadban uses addition. The Mc Farlanes also use addition.
… dukater.. ST, P. 284, 17: Ghadban uses explicitation (footenote); The McFarlanes do not.
, de prأ¸vede… ST, P. 284, 23: Ghadban uses paraphrase and parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes part the long sentence.
, Imamen ser folk,… ST, P. 284, 24: Ghadban uses deletion and parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes part the long sentence.
.. Komassi… St. P. 284, 31: Ghadban has an explicitation (footenote). The McFarlanes do not, but put it in italics.
…specidaler… ST, P. 284, 31: Ghadban has explicitation, but the McFarlanes do not have. Instead they put it in italics.
… saa der maaske netop I dette en opmأ¦rksomhed fra arabernes side… ST, P. 284, 35: Ghadban uses paraphrase. The McFarlanes use direct translation.
;man vilde spare os for besvأ¦ret med at veksle de store mأ¸ntsorter… ST, p. 285, 1: Ghadban uses paraphrase, and parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes use colon.
… og han… ST, p. 285, 6: Ghadban parts the long sentence, but the McFarlanes do not.
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, det sidste sأ¦lges nأ¦sten altid… ST, p. 285, 15: Ghadban uses paraphrase and parts the long sentence; the McFarlanes do not, but use explicitaion between brackets.
, der er boder… ST, p. 285, 17: Ghadban parts the long sentence. The McFarlanes do not.
, skriver. ST, p. 285, 21. Ghadban has addition in order to look English. The McFarlanes do the same.
Note: In the last expression at the end of the paragraph, the McFarlanes do not follow the English rule that says, “Numbers over nineteen should be written in numbers.” They write “twenty” while Ghadban write “20”.
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Appendix 2: The micro strategies in Ghadban’s translation.
…, at de med deres sygdomshأ¦rgede ansigter… p. 281, 20. ...depicting starving robbers on their faces. P. 11, l. 11 Paraphrase …, og da de sidder… P.282, 2 ...while having... p. 11, l. 25 Paraphrase …..ankommer Imamens velkomstgaver. P.282, .3. , the Imams gifts arrive as a welcome. P.11, 25. Adapttion. …der er fem… p.282. l. 3 ... having five.. P.11, 26. Paraphrase ; han er travlt… p.282, 7. .......... Deletion Parting paragraph Humأ¸ret stiger… p.282, 13 ....give them a chance for recovery and getting better. P.12, l. 4 Paraphrase. Parting paragraph …min sandten…p. 282, .14 ......... Deletion , han indrأ¸mmer… p.282, 15 He admits… p.12, 06. Paring the sentence. ; ved synet af hans tilstand…p. 282,.17 At the time people would see him,… p. 12, .7 Paraphrase. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one.
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…mellem hأ¦nderne paa dem, et sted… p.282,.19 …among them. In one place… p. 12, 8-9 Paraphrase. Parting the long sentence two times. ..ikke spadseregange..” p.282, 28. , rather than wandering.” P.12, 17 Paraphrase. , og fأ¸rst… p.282, .33. .......... Deletion Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. Pأ¥ hans hأ¸jre side stod hans sأ¸nner,..p.283, 18 His sons stood on his right side,.. p.14, 33-34 . In English, the heavy phrase should be the last one. ; derimod… p.283, l.26. On the other hand....p.13, l. 3 Paraphrase. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. “Allah… p.283, l.30. (look for foodnote1) Explicitation. Jeg fatted mig dog hurtigt igen,…p. 284, 3. I rapidly comprehended the situation,…p. 13, . 9-10 Paraphrase. … den dialekt der tales i Sana,….p. 284, l. 8 …the dialect of Sana,…p. 12, 12 Paraphrase.
Da han helst ikke vil gaa… p. 284, 10. Hhe rather prefers not to go…p. 13, 13 .Adaptation. Parting the
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sentence Undervejs hertil…p. 284, 13 Under this part of the journey… p.13, 17. Paraphrase. Parting Paragraph , berأ¸mt for…p. 284, 14. , which is famous for… p. 13, 17. Addition. …dukater…p. 284, l. 17 (Look for footnote 2) Explicitation. , Imamen ser folk,… p. 284, 24. ............ -Deletion. -Parting again the same long sentence, and starting a new one. …komassi…p. 284, .31. (look for footnote 3) Explicitation. …specidaler…p. 284, .31. Look for footnote 4) Explicitation. …saa laa der maaske netop I dette en opmأ¦rksomhed fra arabernes side…p. 284, 35. …so that it could be a good gesture from the Arabs’ side. p. 13, 32. Paraphrase. ; man vil spare os for besvأ¦ret med at veksle de store mأ¸ntsorter.…p.285 1. The meaning is that we spare ourselves troubles of changing money. P. 13, 32-33 Paraphrase. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. …og han… p.285, . 6. Now, in his work, he … p.13, 35. - Deletion -Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. , det sidste sأ¦lges som nأ¦sten altid…p. 285, 15. Almost always… p.15, 4. . Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. -Paraphrase , der er boder… p.285, 17. There are stalls… p.14, 5 Parting the long sentence and starting a new one.
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, skriver. P. 285, 21. , and scriveners. P.14, .8. Addition.
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Appendix 3: The micro strategies in the McFarlanes’ translation
The source text: “Det lykkelige Arabien” The target text: Arabia Felix Comments …der har hأ¦ngt paa dem lige siden أ†gypten,… p.281 l.19. , which they had worn ever since Egypt… p.286, l. 34. Oblique translation. …ligner en bande forsultne rأ¸vere. P. 281, L.21 Like a band of famished robbers than anything else. P. 286, Ls.36-37. Addition. …I lnge tider…p. 282, l.1 …many a long day…p. 287, l.16. Substitution. Men det giver dem til gengأ¦ld en mulighed for at komme lidt til hأ¦gterne. P.282, L. 12-13 Yet this did give them a chance of recovering somewhat. P. 287, L.27-28. Deletion. Humأ¸ret stiger,… p.282, l. 13. Their spirits rose;… p.287, l.28. Addition. , og nu ankommer min sandten Berggren fra Damar. p.282, Ls.13-14. … and who should also arrive from Damar but Berggren. p. 287, Ls.28-29 Paraphrase. , han indrأ¸mmer,… p. 282, l. 15. He admitted… p. 287, l. 30. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. , at denne tur var skrappere end krigen I Prأ¸jsen,… p. 282, ls.15-16. … that this last trip had been harder than any war in Prussia, … p. 287, ls. 30-31. Addition. Substitution. “any” instead of “the” … udvej… p. 282, l.16. …nothing else… p. 287, l.32. Substitution.
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; ved synet af… p.282, l. 17. At the sight of… p. 287, l. 33. Direct translation. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. … gaa hen og dأ¸ mellem hأ¦nderne paa dem,… p. 282, ls.18-19. … die on them. P. 287, L.34 Deletion. , et sted…p. 282, l.19. At one place… p. 287, ls.34-35. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one. …at bliver ham kvit ! p. 282, l.20. …. could be rid of him. P. 287, l. 36. Deletion of the exclamation mark. … bortset fra de to, der aldrig fik Sana at see. P. 282, Ls. 21-22. …………………………….. The whole expression is deleted. … af lutter smukke vأ¦relser… p. 282, ls.25-26. … of lovely rooms,… p. 288, l. 4. Deletion. …. Formiddagen… p. 282, l.30. … forenoon… p.288, l.10. Direct translation. … store anstalter… p. 282, l.32. … elaborate arrangements… p. 288, ls. 10-11. Substitution. , fortalt af bondesأ¸nnen selv I den form, han aldrig siden blev trأ¦t at gentage:… p. 283, ls.4-5. … told by Niebuhr himself:… p. 288, l. 20. deletion of a whole expression. -Substitution. ,…. Og klأ¦det over hans knأ¦. p. 283, L. 24. … and also his clothing where it hung down over one knee. P. 289, ls.5-6. Addition. , saa kan jeg ikke nأ¦gte,… p. 283, l.35. , I cannot deny…. P. 289, L.19. Deletion. , at jeg blev noget forskrأ¦kket… p. 284, l.1 …that I was rather alarmed…p. 289, l.19. Substitution.
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Jeg fatted mig hurtigt igen,…p. 284, l. 3. I quickly recovered my composure, however … p. 289, l.22. Deletion. Addition. … begyndte at raabe op,… p. 284, l. 4. … began to shout again… p. 289, l.23. Addition. , faldt det mig ind, at det ved denne ceremony gik for sig omtrent paa same made, som naar vi hjemme lade en mand lever med hurra-raab.” P. 284, ls. 5-7. , it occurred to me that what was happening at this ceremony was rather like what happens at home when we call for three cheers.” P. 289, Ls.24-26. Paraphrase. … gaa I enkeltheder med hensyn til motiverne til deres rejse,… p. 284, ls. 10-11 … go into detail about the perpose and motive of their expedition, … p. 289, l. 30. Changing from plural into singular. Addition: “perpose.” Undervejs hertil… p. 284, l. 13 On their journey… p. 289, l.33. Paraphrase. , at opholdet I Mokka…p.284, l.16. , nor that their stay in Mocha… p. 289, l. 37. Addition. … 50 venetianske dukater,… p. 284, l.17. … fifty Venetian ducats, .. p. 289, ls. 37-38. Following the English rule, numbers over 19 should be in alphabetics. … af Forsskأ¥ls efterladte fysikredskaber. P. 284, l. 28. … pieces of Forsskأ¥l’s equipment. P. 290 Ls. 12-13. Substitution. Da de atter er vendt tilbage til huset I haven med springvanderne,… ls. 29-30. When they again returned to their house, …p. 290, l.14. - Addition. - Deletion. , og han I sit arbejde saa stأ¦rkt generet af nysgerrige,….p. 285, ls.6-7. , and the crowds of curious onlookers so interfered with his work… p. 290, ls. 27-28. Paraphrase. , det arbejde han I gamle - the kind of work he - Adding explicitation
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dage udfأ¸rte sammen med Forsskأ¥l. P. 285, Ls. 12-13. used to do with Forsskأ¥l. P. 290, Ls.32-33. dash. - Paraphrase … som nأ¦sten altid I Arabien ... p. 285, Ls. 15-16 ( as it is almost everywhere in Arabia)… p. 290, l.36. Addition of parantice. … der er boder med tyrkiske, indiske og persiske varer. P. 285, Ls. 17-18. , and where there were stalls with Turkish, Indian and Persian goods. P.290/291 ls. 38/1. Addition. Der er haandvأ¦rkergaderne… p. 285, ls. 19-20. There were streets for various trades,… p. 291, ls. 3-4. Substitution. , at den danske ekspedition efter audience… p. 285, ls. 25-26. , after their audience,… p. 291, ls. 9-10. Substitution. , og nu… p. 285, l.30. And now… p. 291, l. 14. Parting the long sentence and starting a new one.
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Appendix 4: Thorkild Hansen- Det Lykkelig